Book smarts are overrated. Its street smarts that really matter. In my books street smarts beat book smarts 11 out of 10 times, every time.
But book smarts are the traditional way to get good grades in school. And good grades do matter, somewhat. So I propose that you use your God-given street smarts to out-smart your teachers and do good in school.
After all, I am a teacher so I know what I’m talking about.
How To Do Good In School
- Sit in the middle of your classroom. Teachers hate the trouble makers at the back equally as much as they hate the annoying teacher’s pets at the front. Each make the teachers work harder than they really want to.
- Use your ADHD meds only in emergencies so you can horde them up and sell them to your smart classmates for favors. Favors such as writing essays for you, and helping you cheat on tests.
- Cheat on tests. Bring two cell phones with you. One you give to your teacher at the door, the other has pictures of all your notes. You can even text that smart geek that you sold your pills to for answers.
- If one or both of your parents has the ability to turn into a pit bull on a dime, use that to your advantage. Remind your teachers of your parents. Teachers don’t like getting attacked by pit bulls any more than you do.
- Speaking of parents, you can pretend that they will physically abuse you if you don’t do good on a test. Prior to telling your teacher this, make sure to rub your eyes with lemon juice or onions to get those tears flowing. There’s nothing teachers hate more than crying teenagers.
- Give your teacher a really expensive gift card. Do avoid book store gift cards. When they’re on summer break teachers like to have fun, not read stupid books. Make sure to give this gift card the day prior to your final exam. And it goes without saying, the more the better.
- A lot of teachers, especially the old ones, are stupid with technology. Working in pairs, one of you distract the teacher while the other download their computer files onto your flash card. Download everything. You can sort through it later.
- Bully your teacher. Teachers hate bullies, but they also don’t get paid enough to put themselves into any sort of physical danger. All out threaten them. Go for it!
Now get to work kids!