That’s right, it’s February the 14th and the last thing on my mind is Valentine’s Day. Why? Because DRAGONE is an independent thinker and feeler. He does not follow the sheep to wherever it is that sheep go. He wouldn’t know where sheep go cuz he’s never been there. There’s a lot of places he’s never been, and that place is one of them.
He does not buy flowers just because the day says he should. He buys flowers whenever he is romantically inspired to buy flowers, and only then. He can’t remember when the last time that was, but it sure as heck wasn’t on Valentine’s Day. It’s not important when the last time that he bought flowers was, if he ever bought flowers at all. It’s the principle that matters. He doesn’t even know where the local flower store is, but he suspects that it’s filled with sheep.
DRAGONE does not buy chocolates just because it’s February 14th and it’s the coldest day of the year. As far as he is concerned chocolate is a daily consumable product, so he does in fact buy chocolate on February 14th. But it is not a special purchase of chocolates as the day dictates that it should be. It is a regular purchase of whichever 2 for 1 special is being promoted by the local convenience store.
Chocolate is good. Milk chocolate is the best. Milk chocolate is smooth, creamy, and depending on your preference may contain nuts. Chocolate is better than sex. “Say what?” you say. “Is DRAGONE actually a woman?” you ask.
Let me be clear ladies: No. DRAGONE is a man. A man who’s in tune with the longings and desires of the women of this world. DRAGONE is a romantic man. A romantic man who’s romance is not programmed into his iPhone calendar. A romantic man who really is from Romania. A sexy man. A sexy man with a thick, sexy, Transylvanian accent. A sexy man with a long, protruding widows peak. A sexy man with a refined taste for blood.
This is NOT A Valentine’s Day post. This is a post on Valentine’s Day.