DRAGONE is in a foul mood. He was in the middle of a Gedankenexperiment (an Albert Einstein thought experiment) while writing his love manifesto, when the phone rang.
Look Mr. Asswipe, if I wanted to sign up for Rogers Internet and have Mr. Rogers fuck me up the ass with his golden wand looking for more money to add to his collection, then I would have called you personally, long distance to India. As it turns out, no amount of cold yogurt can soothe what your country has done to my ass, having gorged on curry chicken last night.
Now I have forgotten my thought experiment, and even which of the Kama Sutra positions I was about to research for my love manifesto. As everyone knows, love is more of a science than an art.
Well, I guess more meds are needed for DRAGONE’s memory to jumpstart. I can’t remember if I have taken any today. Oh well. More amphetamines please!
DRAGONE’s amphetamine of choice is called Vyvanse. It is for his ADD. It’s a miracle drug, really. It brings out the H in me, turning me into ADHD. Without the hyperactivity, ADD is such a boring condition. Sleepy daydreams. But throw in the hyperactivity and I turn into a real person with a real personality who cusses the fuck out of shit. Thank you amphetamines.
Now back to my love manifesto. Mrs. DRAGONE seems to think that I am not qualified to write such a book. But I think that she is in no position to judge my loving abilities as she is too close to me. It is impossible for her to give an unbiased opinion.
So onwards I trod, writing and researching, in the hopes that one day children around the world will thank me for teaching them the ways of the DRAGONE love machine.
I will be sure to reveal some excerpts in the upcoming weeks and months to come.