You know it’s springtime in the city when you start spotting old bald men driving red convertibles. Sometimes the convertibles are white, but the men are always old, and they are always bald.
This does not make sense. Why would a bald man not cover his head while driving over a cement inferno otherwise known as a highway, while the Sun is beating down directly overhead? I can literally see their brains bubbling old man acid through the pores of their red, sweaty scalps. And their scalps are always red and sweaty.
The only way that this could possibly be tolerated, from the old bald man’s point of view (not anyone else’s), is if the old man lathered his bald head with some serious sunscreen. Now that’s a nice picture, isn’t it? Thick and creamy sunscreen coating an old bald head, with beads of sweat fighting to escape the boiling brain acid that is chasing them down a thick and hairy neck.
This is the Ewww side of bald. Stay tuned for tomorrow, when you will be treated to the Awesome side of bald. Unless of course something else more interesting comes along.